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Propel
It’s the last day of 2015. I just left work early for the day and am making a grocery list for the evening. Everyone over on social media land seems to be reflecting on their year. Which has me thinking, too.
A few years ago I stopped choosing New Year’s resolutions and started picking a word, one word, along the lines of My One Word. It’s a wonderful concept. Ditch the guilt and embrace a word that embodies something you want to improve on over the year. The word health could embody more than just physical well-being. It could translate into healthier relationships all around, people, work, food. Nourish could mean spending time nourishing your body, your mind, your soul, and maybe even your relationships with the ones you love. Faith could inspire not just your religious faith, but your faith in yourself and those around you. Can you see why this is a much better alternative to resolutions?
Some folks pray and meditate on their word regularly. They ask God to show them how to better live out their lives in the context of their chosen word. My little ADHD brain usually tucks it away in the back of my subconscious and takes it out to play with it at the odd moment throughout the year.
One year my word was fearless, as in fear less. Actually, I think I used that word two years in a row. I needed it. Another year it was courage. In 2014 it was preparation. My word for 2015 was propel.
Propel – to drive or cause to move forward or onward.
There were a lot of things I wanted do this year. I was successful with some and with others, not so much. But looking back, I do believe even my failures helped propel me toward bigger and better things. I may not have succeeded in some of the things I had hoped to accomplish, but I do believe each attempt got me closer to where I wanted to be.
Propel.
For example, I attempted the Whole 30 several times before finally completing it. Each time, as with the 21-Day Sugar Detox, I learned more about myself and my relationship with food. For as long as I can remember, I’ve used food to fill various voids in my life and recognizing that is half the battle toward creating new and healthier habits.
I think the most valuable thing I learned this year is that alcohol is not my friend. I love wine. I love the taste of wine, especially a really good dry red. I really enjoyed participating in the local wine culture in my town. I used to fantasize about finding a job in the industry. I wrote a paper on the wine industry in France for one of my master’s degree courses. I even bought several bottles of French wine at the time as “research.” After some thought, I decided it was probably best not to cite the labels. After all, I went to a Nazarene university, and Nazarenes don’t drink alcohol. Our teachers even had to take a vow of alcohol abstinence as part of their teaching contract. Writing a paper on the industry was one thing, but citing the labels would probably have been a bit too much. I could totally figure out how to cite that label if I wanted to, though.
This year after completing the Whole 30, I discovered that my body does not react well to alcohol. Even just one glass would leave me feeling really hungover the next day, like I'd had the whole bottle. I eventually realized that it was robbing me of time, energy, and mental acuity that I wanted to spend elsewhere. As much as I love kicking back with a glass of wine, I needed to give it up. My desire to do other things with my life had eclipsed my desire to drink wine. It was a total shocker to me, too.
One of the secret desires that I’ve held close to my heart my whole life is to write. Giving up the alcohol freed me up to focus on why I want to write, what kind of stories I want to write, and to begin to question why I find it so hard to make myself vulnerable on paper as well as here on this blog. I’ve spent a lot of time this year working on research for a few projects. I joined a local group of writers who meet periodically and support one another. I participated in NaNoWriMo this year and hit my 50,000 word count goal. (Yeah, me!) I’m not where I want to be, but I am closer than I was.
Propel.
Professionally, I completed a major industry designation that involved a series of nine challenging exams. I went to a national conference, which is a big deal considering my anxiety in crowds. And I accepted a leadership position in a local organization related to my job that definitely stretches me outside of my comfort zone.
Propel.
I’m still carefully considering what my one word for next year will be. I’ve got a few contenders, but I’m going to spend some time talking to God about them before I settle on one.
Consider ditching the self-flagellation over unfinished resolutions. If you could choose one word to work on in 2016, what would that word be? Write it down somewhere. Hide it away in your heart and see what unfolds over the next 12 months. Maybe we'll meet back here in a year and swap stories. What do you think?
